The Fallen Saint

fallen angel

A saint’s life ain’t easy. It’s harsh, painful, and miserable. I know. I lived with one for years. Misery loves company.

People still say, “It’s so hard to imagine,” or “She seemed so nice,” or “I can’t believe that happened in our own backyard.” But those people are few, most don’t say anything. They never did. Silence is eerie that way.

It’s true she helped the poor, the indigent, the crippled and the lame. Hurt people with nothing left. Caring for people like that isn’t easy. It’s harsh, saddening, and depressing. They don’t trust you or want your help. It’s hard work and even harder to watch. That makes it a great place to hide. She taught me that.

It’s easy to hide because that’s when we shut our eyes and pray. We pray the pain, the despair doesn’t last. That it’s temporary, it’s not real. We pray because we care. She preys too. It’s unfair but it can’t be helped.

Why are some prayers answered while others aren’t? Maybe we don’t live long enough to get the answers. I don’t know. I stopped praying when she held out her hand. Why hope for a way out, if she’s going to drag me down when she falls? And she will. I know that.

She’ll fall because we all do. Everyone trips. But unlike everyone else, people want saints to fall. Mistakes make them relatable, more human. We see saints most when they fall.

We start talking and asking questions. Questions like, “Why her,” or “Why now?” Eventually, inevitably someone will ask, “Who hurt the people with nothing left?” And questions, unlike prayers, are always answered.

A saint’s life ain’t easy. I know. It’s built on misery, pain, and suffering, but whose?

Update, the follow up post The Offer is now out.

About: I didn’t intend to but I went dark for this week’s Foreshadow challenge. Like an earlier post, it’s inspired by a movie character that accepts only two types of repayment, cash or pain.

I like the speaker and the subject enough to explore them more. I affectionately call them the Unseen and the Fallen, respectively. If you’re interested in reading more about them please let me know. I feel they live in a rich and dark world, so it’s bound to surprise. As always comments are welcome and if you prefer to leave a private comment please use this form.

© Chic Prune 2014


60 thoughts on “The Fallen Saint

  1. Wow…this piece is really…deep? Intriguing? Immersing. REALLY draws you in. I love the idea of hiding in service/work. it’s so easy to overlook someone’s pain if that person is helping someone else with theirs; one assumes that someone who helps others must have so much going in his/her life that it must be shared, but never that the person helping may be experiencing more hurt than the person they’re helping. I also really dug the Hidden/Fallen archetypes. Very mysterious and cool. Very well done!

    PS. I think you may have left the word “isn’t,” out of this sentence, maybe? “A saint’s life ain’t easy. I know. It’s built on misery, pain, and suffering, but whose?”

    Again, well done.


    Liked by 1 person

  2. Amazing piece, and speaking as someone who has a family member with a disability, it perfectly captures the mindset. When you’re relied upon like that, it becomes very easy to see yourself as just a carer, and not an individual. And it does set you up for an inevitable ‘fall’, or breakdown.


  3. Clap, clap, clap. Brilliant piece. Many people may have found themselves here. Vulnerability is, in fact, a place of strength, as people meet and greet there without fear. Not recognizing that inner strength makes us worship saints. There isn’t any…


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